Confessions of an Autodidact*

*Please note this very controversial post was written late at night by a very sleepy girl.
Some of you lovely people, who are most likely dividing your attention between my thoughts for the day and the show New Girl (which I might add was WAY over hyped for what it turned out to be) might not know that I am a sort of autodidact (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/autodidactic) (ya, that’s right, I knew you would need that.) By "sort" I mean this, I have always been homeschooled but as I got older I began to teach a few subjects to myself, such as literature, history, and math. This year I go to school 3 days a week at a special school (for us awesome people who don’t really know what kind of school their doing) for 1 to 3 hours and then come home, swim in homework and teach myself history and math. So I’m not a true autodidact but like I said, there really isn’t a name for what I do. All this is a lead up to the fact that I have had very tiring school week. And (that’s right mom, I just started a sentence with "and") what I mean by tiring is that feeling that your brain is just like a clock, doing what you are supposed to do and say but not really meaning or feeling anything. If someone showed me a 30 second video and asked me what I thought of it, well, I can see three possible answers. 1. I fall asleep, 2.My eyes melted like in Indiana Jones and I flew away with butterfly wings 3. I wouldn’t even know. At this point I’m not really sure which one is more likely than the other. I am now wondering (now this is going to sound silly but don’t be a hater) if this is what public schoollers feel like. I really have no idea what it would be like to sit and listen to teachers talk from 9-4 and then go home and try to recreate what they taught me. Us less traditionally taught people often get annoyed at those in the system because a majority of those people seem in a way, all the same. What I mean by this is girls straighten their hair, put it in a pony tail, wear track shorts and a white v-neck. Or skinny jeans with straight layered hair, and too much eye liner. Of course this isn’t all of them, I know public schooled people who aren’t like that at all, but as a majority they seem very similar. Also to be in this school setting you must play a sport, after every game you must facebook how you love your team mates, and how your team beasted. Show picture of you and your besties in a dressing room playing dress up, with your heads tipped down. This of course is the girls and once again I must stress that this is the impressions I get from allot (not all) public schoollers. This seems like a very long rabbit trail but it has a point. The point being that I wonder if one of the reasons they act a certain way (besides wanting to be being popular) is because they always feel how I feel right now. So mentally "done" that one has no personal feelings or convictions left. Wow this is a long post...I can almost feel my eyes beginning to drip, and some sort of flutter on by back...but I really wonder, because the homeschooled crowd can be exceedingly judgmental as I have learned from personal experience, if this strange conforming habits those kids get into to is because they (as I feel now) just don’t have any mental room left. I could completely be wrong, I probably am, but its an interesting thought none the less.

p.s It is surprisingly difficult to come up with quotes I feel like showing the world, so when I can find none I shall post my favorite song (which changes at least once a day)
Fever by Michael Buble'

I wish I was shopping for crayons...

It seems like just yesterday my biggest problem was if the crayon pack for the new school year came with a sharpener. Things  have changed. This post is at the end of my 2nd day of school and, well, let's just say naps shouldn't be just for preschoolers. I have quite a lot of homework, and maybe signing up to do a Westminster Confession (10-20 min) speech with only a week to prepare --wasn't the best idea, oh well. But this isn't one of those posts where people go on and on about how hard it is to grow up, nope this is not one of those. I do love school really, I love learning, and I love some of the benefits of growing up (lack of sleep isn't one of them, but that is mostly my fault.) One benefit is that I get to eat those lovely chips that you see above.  So its pretty darn good. This is getting really rambly and I now apologize. I just really felt the need to tell someone that I have way too much homework, but I love my life. So far school's going well though, my classes are cool, I like my teachers, and I love my fellow inmates (did I just say that out loud, I mean students.) In addition, I won't be reading as many books this year, so the ones I post will be mostly required reads like The Inferno, with maybe a few  personal books I can sneak in. I am running out of books from this summer  (it takes me a lot less time to write about a book than to read it.) Here is one last book.

Of Thee I Zing by Lauren Ingraham

What it is about: The current downgrade of American society told in a humorous and very conservative viewpoint.
@ rating: @@@ out of five. It is straight to the point and, along with the obvious social defects (if it doesn't fit don't wear it), it also has some other not so often mentioned social downfalls.
Not so wonderful aspects: The whole book is criticism of America, which can get tedious, and they are very much her opinions, so I wouldn't try to put them in a bill. The biggest downer for me is that she offered no solution to the endless problems our country seems to possess.
Overall: This book is worth the read, but take it with a grain of salt. ( I don't actually know what that phrase means but people seem to use it in this context.)

I hope you enjoyed this rambling post, and I will try my best not to use the internet as my personal shrink. Hope this makes your day a little bit better.
Cheese...Milk's leep toward immortality. ~ Clifton Fadiman